My secret is my strong belief equally in the equal value and significance of both family and career in one's life!
I would like to think I'm both. I see myself more on the strict side when it comes to education, behaviour, attitude, respect and discipline. I'm cooler on the social side, like with teenage slang vocabulary, admiring contemporary music, participating in weird friends' activities, having crazy shopping habits and to top it all: an 'I can't-live-without-sushi-syndrome!'
I've passed this stage since some time now. It was a hassle then taking care of twins simultaneously. Without the help of the entire family, I don't think I would've managed. It was double trouble back then.
My 'Me' time is mainly socializing with friends, exercising at the gym or spending a relaxing day at the spa.
Not answering their cell phones. Although, it's glued on their hands at home, but when I call, it's surprisingly 'on silent, wasn't with me or couldn't hear it!'
The tolerance, patience and responsibility traits that suddenly developed in my personality were really astonishing!
I hope they learn to: First, think twice before taking any decision. Second, devote an enormous amount of effort in anything they want to achieve and even more effort to maintain it. And third, to be fair, fun and faithful.
Mostly in their looks, moods, emotions and fashion awareness.
I got hand crafted flowers and a card from my girl saying, 'Hey mum, FYI: I think you've done a great job with us. Have a wonderful mother's day and forget all the wrong things we do. Love you a lot.'
Unfortunately there are no rules or guidelines. You bring up siblings exactly the same way and they still come out differently. You try teaching them ethics and behaviour, the way you learnt it a quarter of a decade ago while completely forgetting the age-gap and generational differences. So, it's best to play it by instinct and good intention. I believe when they're under ten, you're in the most controlling phase of their lives. You will direct and take action and they will listen. This is the ultimate foundation base. The next phase, when they're teenagers is the most painful for you and the most rebellious for them. Here you will only TRY to direct and advise and if you're lucky, they might listen or heed 10% of what you recommend. The last up-bringing phase is college when they'll definitely be off the hook and free to run away from home and from you. Here at this stage, literally anything you say is considered absolute non-sense and a complete waste of time! Good luck.
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